Here I am; a shadow of my old self. Yes. Those of you who know me as an overly organised, always on top of things, always on the move, kind of person, might actually go into cardiac arrest when looking at my current state. And this is no joke…
Vanja and I have made countless efforts to revitalize it; the pumping rhythm of the city, that chain of goals and objectives succeeding one another, even that frustrating feeling of never having enough time (even though your plan is close to immaculate). Shock-a-shock we’ve actually been looking for this state of mind… even slightly missing it.
I know. In a few months from now I will be eating my words up. I will be calling home in tears saying: “I can’t take it, I just need one full night of sleep…and another 12 hours to the day”. Time will, again, be in short supply.
But it’s dead, the stress, and Cádiz has ‘killed’ it. It took us a while to wrap our heads around it, even longer to join in and another good while to actually understand it; the Cádiz effect.
At first we were thrilled about the stress-less atmosphere, and accordingly we took our time to slow down and kick back in the sand. That was the time when we could still fish for London in our blood, and we didn’t have to look that deep. Now days we are searching, and are yet to be lucky. Instead we keep finding one example after another of how a city can seemingly swallow your ambition, simply by ridding the purpose for its existence. You don’t need to dream big here, it’s the small that counts. You don’t need to be quick here, because rest dominates.
And it doesn’t seem to bother a soul that students retake, and retake and retake courses in all eternity, some day, he will become a doctor, or an engineer or an economist. Life is too short to waste on obsessive studying is what Cádiz seems to be saying, just live a little and a little bit more…and the rest will be ok in due time. It makes a good point, this city, to all of us hyped up ciudadanos (city-people). About not forgetting to stop and see, not neglecting to listen and enjoy.
Yet we miss the city because it gives us purpose, it stimulates us and challenges us to evolve… Cádiz poses another challenge, that of how to enjoy while keeping alive your ambition. But as sure as Cádiz is a killer…we can revive London again.
Vanja and I have made countless efforts to revitalize it; the pumping rhythm of the city, that chain of goals and objectives succeeding one another, even that frustrating feeling of never having enough time (even though your plan is close to immaculate). Shock-a-shock we’ve actually been looking for this state of mind… even slightly missing it.
I know. In a few months from now I will be eating my words up. I will be calling home in tears saying: “I can’t take it, I just need one full night of sleep…and another 12 hours to the day”. Time will, again, be in short supply.
But it’s dead, the stress, and Cádiz has ‘killed’ it. It took us a while to wrap our heads around it, even longer to join in and another good while to actually understand it; the Cádiz effect.
At first we were thrilled about the stress-less atmosphere, and accordingly we took our time to slow down and kick back in the sand. That was the time when we could still fish for London in our blood, and we didn’t have to look that deep. Now days we are searching, and are yet to be lucky. Instead we keep finding one example after another of how a city can seemingly swallow your ambition, simply by ridding the purpose for its existence. You don’t need to dream big here, it’s the small that counts. You don’t need to be quick here, because rest dominates.
And it doesn’t seem to bother a soul that students retake, and retake and retake courses in all eternity, some day, he will become a doctor, or an engineer or an economist. Life is too short to waste on obsessive studying is what Cádiz seems to be saying, just live a little and a little bit more…and the rest will be ok in due time. It makes a good point, this city, to all of us hyped up ciudadanos (city-people). About not forgetting to stop and see, not neglecting to listen and enjoy.
Yet we miss the city because it gives us purpose, it stimulates us and challenges us to evolve… Cádiz poses another challenge, that of how to enjoy while keeping alive your ambition. But as sure as Cádiz is a killer…we can revive London again.
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2 comments:
Wow, it is like reading my mind!!! Yet again Shani, another wonderful piece of work. You've summed up all our thoughts, feelings, doubts and wonders into an enjoyable text. Start writing a book womannn!!!
Big kisss xxx
Cadiz killed my work ethic...but it was worth it. :) After 3 months of work and a month of classes I think I might almost be back to my normal stressed and studious self.
by the way, I love reading about your new Cadiz experiences this semester!
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